"...And So This is Life"

Change.

If life stayed the same, we would never get the chance to push our boundaries and find our limits. Change happens to us, around us, before us, and behind us; and if we're lucky, we get the chance to pause a moment and try to make sense of it all.

The past few months have been a ride of tears, laughter, adventure, planning, breaking, loving and independence. It's been a time of growing up, in a way that only death can make one grow, although I am not sure "up" is the direction one heads. Anyway, there is a lot on the plate of life that deserves mentioning;

• Alex. 5-6. Peace is in you.
  
• Mom's knee replacement surgery went well. She is recovering with full family help and even back to work part-time. Locked up and ornery is not the way to keep Wen-dawg... that is assuming you've the desire to live. (I'm gonna pay for that one!)
• Spring is blooming and Summer is heating up in Berlin. Berliners deserve their sun... and so in goes this 4-day weekend... :)
• Biergartens are OPEN! Welcome to Berlin!
• Julie Lamz and her fiance Greg will be here late June/early July before India... YES!!! This will be an amazing memory created for all...
• Kathryn will be leaving us for a new teaching position closer to home back in Manchester. She has promised to visit often and has also opened up her future pimp pad to be visited. "If you're not a Manc, you're a wank..." Believe what you want, Rim-nuts! :)
  
• I've been cycling with some colleagues after work and am excited to be back on the bike after a loooooooong winter. My friends are faster, lighter, and fun! I am getting better every day that I train with them!
  
• We played Assassin at work for the past 3 weeks... I placed 4/42... not bad. I was murdered on a technicality of my assassin finding the clue under the soccer goal first! Nice game, Joost. Just remember... there's always next year and our alliance is stronger than ever!
  
• Definitely ran into some old friends of my p's from the police force days. This proves that strong ties with good people does last forever! I met Susan across the brunch table on Mothers' Day via an Embassy family I am getting to know. Very. Small. World.
  

Upcoming Travels

• I will be in Madrid, Spain with Kathryn over the weekend of June 12. I am very much looking forward to being in such a fabulous place with such a great friend!
  

• India (5 July-26 July) is booked and planning is in the works! We went to the Indian Embassy this morning... apparently my mother country and last name are enough to charge me extra than those from Great Britain... hmmm... this is only the beginning! We have also booked flights from Mumbai to Delhi and have a tentaive course of travel set as... Mumbai, Delhi (Golden Triangle: Delhi, Jaipur, Agra), Varanasi, Himalayan hiking, Calcutta & Goa. It's monsoon season... poetic.
• Chicago (26 July-18 August) and the LG... here I come!!! I can't wait to wrap my arms around you! 8 weekends and counting...
  

The days are getting brighter, longer, and warmer. The air smells of flowers and the biergartens flow endlessly.... oh, sorry, back on track. There are 16 reports for sale, I mean to write for sale, er... Focus and Spring do not mix. Neither does Katy and 16 OC Third (almost fourth, almost all of them... j/k) Graders who are attempting to do same.

TBC...
kate
xo

"It's Not Fair"

We have heard this since we were kids, and yet it doesn't get any easier to hear. I hate this now more than ever and can't seem to find justice in hearing it again. I don't want it to be fair. I want it to be right. And cancer and kids do NOT EVER belong in the same sentence. I do not care how fair or unfair it is. I just know it is not right.

Life is good. Alex inspires us all to remember this, cherish this, and love this. He is the bravest person I have ever met; a title sure to never be topped.

Carpe Diem... for him.
love kate xo
(5-6)

Summer

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity.
(Eleanor Roosevelt)

There is a lot being planned and all of the fun is about to explode. Lizzy arrives in less than a week, and AL & UM the week thereafter. This is too exciting!

India was booked yesterday. I will travel 3 weeks, spending the first 2 winding our way from Mumbai (Bombay) up to Delhi, and back down again to the wildly popular beaches of Goa. The plans are unraveling fast and we are engaged in lots of excited chatter as new ideas spring to life on how to spend our time. This will be the first place I will visit that I need to apply for a visa and prep my body to avoid illness. Hopefully, no "Delhi Belly" for me!

I fly direct from Mumbai to Chicago to be with my family and friends at home. My trip will be just over 3 weeks and spent entirely at the lake with my people. The lake is my home, of this I am more sure than ever.

It boggles me to try and wrap my brain around how incredible the opportunities I am afforded; still not clear of the line that separates when/if these opps are created for or by me. It's not so much the glamour of the travel, as it is the people and culture and nauture and languages and beliefs and religions and love and differences and wines and educations and familes and clothing and smells and weather and foods and sport and beer and challenges and experiences that unravel me slowly and steadily. For this, I am better able to serve those around me in a more honest light.

There is not a particular one to thank for this, although the first to come to mind are my mom and dad, who have given me the wings to fly so boldly, gracefully and lovingly. People often ask where my center comes from, and I always answer so quickly, "my mom." Every single one of you have influenced and taught me to be who I am today, now at this very moment. Thank you for loving me and giving me the space, love, and support necessary to move about so curiously, comfortably and confidently in this ever learning world.

My best to you... always.
kate
xo

The Birthday and St. Patrick's Day

The Invitation

The Invitation
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it, or fade it, or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand at the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, 'Yes.'
It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done for the children.
It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself; and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.
(The Invitation, inspired by Oriah Mountain Dreamer, Native American Elder, May 1994)

Willi and Birthdays

Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop off like autumn leaves.
(John Muir)

...And the fun continues! Skiing the Alps over Feb Break was somewhat of a life changing experience. We were in Baad, Austria with Outward Bound snowshoeing, sleeping in a hut, and skiing. It is hands down, one of the most beautiful places on Earth. The rugged mountains, delicate snowflakes, and unforgiving passes only seize to amaze even the most seasoned of travelers. I had a moment apart from the group where I stood on the peak, overlooking snow-topped mountains for miles. I stood there, wondering how so much beauty can be created and I, of all people, am lucky enough to not only witness it, but use it! With my skis on, and my jacket zipped, I prayed. That's it! I prayed. I prayed for Alex first... knowing that the One in charge of all of this can most certainly take a bite out of the big C...

I was in a different place when I returned. Feeling refreshed and ready for the second half of our school year, I figured out that I need to be in a place where the outdoors are the attraction. I'm thinking oceans or mountains next... we'll have to wait and see what doors are opened.

We celebrated my birthday last week at the Irish Pub near our place. We are heading out tonight to Julep's NY Bar with 20 of my friends and colleagues. It will be fun to be with everyone together.

Kathryn bought me round trip to Madrid over a the weekend on June 12. Not only was this very thoughtful, but so generous as well! I am very excited, as only May does not have any definite travel plans yet.

Lizzy is coming at the end of this month, and April is Aunt Laura and Uncle Mike! I am SO EXCITED to see them and show them around my new "town!"

Hope all is well at home.
All the best,
kate xo

Lots to Update

I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday.
(Author Unknown)

It's been awhile since I've checked in online. The past 2 months have been hectic and unpredictable. Let's go back to Christmas...

I went back to the States for the holidays and spent some awesome quality time with family and friends from home and the lake. It was good to be in the company of honest fans (lol!) as it's never certain who you will find abroad. I miss "my people" sometimes and know that this amazing adventure comes in exchange for other important parts of my life.

A quick list of what has been happening. Please email if you'd like more details! :)

• We celebrated Kathryn's 30th Birthday and spent the evening dancing 'til 5am.
• I completed 17, in-depth, 1 page narratives on each of my students (a form of assessment I have never experienced prior to this year).
• I spent a fun weekend with Addy and Izzy while Jesse and Karen were out of town together. Rem came over and made her Dutch pancakes for dinner and we laid low for 2 days. God I love those kids!
  
• I am taking a formal German language night class for 4.5 hours/week to "sprechen Deutsche."
• Went on a Berlin Bizarre bar Tour that included a toilet and tranny theme (I can tell this is where the emails will begin flowing!)
• I am now hooked on "24" and it is all RimNuts' fault!
• Hosted a Grade 3 Art Exhibition at my school that was cooler than I ever imagined. There is something so personal and inspiring about children's artwork.
• I have been (forcefully) adjusting to morning runs. I hate running in the morning. You all know how I am in the morning (even my poor 5th Graders probably remember!). But, I'd like to complete a 10K this year. So... if I want a social life, I must get it over with before I leave for work or I find I am stuck out for the day.
• I spent last month on a budget I've never experienced. I had to figure out creative ways to mix my existing food choices with low-budget fresh fruits and veggies. This is not as easily done as may be assumed. I've never panicked more, as I have never known the feeling of truly "having no money." Ick.... never want to go back there again.
  
• I spent this past weekend at a conference. Enough said.
  

This coming Saturday (14 Feb.) I will be leaving for an Outward Bound Adventure trip to Austria. We will be skiing, snowshoeing, hiking, and sleeping in an igloo! I am going with 20 BBIS students, along with a friend, Ben (our PE teacher) to chaperone. I am very much looking forward to being out in nature for sport.

This month will be spent traveling to Austria. March brings Lizzy (yaaaaayyyyyyy!) & Jenelle. April brings Aunt Laura and Uncle Mike (yyaaaaayyyyyyy!) for 2 weeks, and May brings a 4 day weekend I haven't planned for yet. June and July are biergarten months, so I will be sticking close to the 'hood.

I know this is brief and has covered a lot of time, but if I spent my life blogging, I wouldn't have a life to blog!

I miss you at home and hope all is well in Chi-Town. Props to Alex and strength to him as he wins his battle again. I miss you, buddy! "The greatest oak was once a little nut who held its ground." (Author Unknown)

Love you all.
kate xo